Journal-12 Bleak mind

Date: 22.03.2021

Day: Monday

” Well, today I’ve got pretty much nothing to talk about. I just felt like coming here and vent all day long. Nothing in particular, though. Just wanna get rid of this numb and vacuous state of mind. No other motives. No ideas. Just a blank mind and rapid moving typing fingers. Idk why but I have this sudden urge to write a piece of poetry. But the thing is I don’t know what to write about. So bleak and blank right now. Sigh. Since I dropped in here today, lemme just give you a quick update on my life. For starters, it’s my mom’s birthday tomorrow. So yay on that. Secondly, my exams begin day after tomorrow. And you know what’s weird about it? I am tensed about the fact that how calm and chill I am. I am totally putting my feet up about the upcoming exams. Like why tf aren’t I tensed and heated up? Is something wrong with me? I seriously doubt that. I’ve noticed that I have become relatively calm when it comes to exams now. At the same time, I am also pressurized to give my best. Does that make sense or does that make me sound crazy? Okay, now I’m pretty sure there is something going on with me. Whatever. What else to talk about? Let’s see. Well, I watched two Netflix documentaries in a row in four days. Shawn Mendes and Taylor Swift. Ngl, I was pretty moved by Miss Americana. Something about it touched me deep. Also, teared up a bit lol. I know it sounds cheesy, but it is what it is. Wow, I never thought I’d be that person who ends up sniffing and wiping tears over documentaries. Initially, I wasn’t into watching 2 hour long docs. But Emma Chamberlain watching the Britney Spears doc kinda made me wanna watch one too. And yeah, I ended up streaming two. Right now, I’m just writing this, sipping a nice cup of green tea. Lol, I don’t know what else to talk about. I wanna write something but I am clueless about the content. Like what is going on with me right now? Yo, I am blank af. So I am just gonna brb you right now.

So, BRB 🙂 “