Journal-31 FOMO over nothing

Date: 24.07.2021

Day: Saturday

“Wow, I feel it’s been a really long time since I’ve popped in here. I haven’t been writing anything these days. Poems, quotes, journaling. Nothing at all. I can’t believe I’m saying this but I’ve had a really tight schedule this whole week. Yeah, that’s pretty unusual coming from me, That sounds so unlike me. But trust me, I’ve never been busier. I didn’t even listen to music for two days straight. I mean, how did I even survive without Billie Eilish lol? A lot has happened this week. Where do I begin from? Right. At the start of the week, I was hard at prepping up for my legal debate competition. Yeah you heard it right. I signed up for a debate. Unbelievable. That is so not introvert of me. And also, I got, I mean WE got (it was a team event) through the first round. And prepping up for second round was more intense and time consuming. I didn’t even have the mind-set to listen to music or even a pod, for that matter. We didn’t get through the second round and that’s good cause I didn’t have the energy to work on more debate stuffs. Truth being told, I was way relieved, at the same time, I was low-key disappointed. But, my relief at the sound of not enduring overweighed my discontentment. So, I guess that’s all that matters. And secondly, omg I cannot believe I’m gonna say this but… I FINALLY HAVE MY OWN FUCKING IG ACCOUNT!!! At last, I got the audacity to finally start one. Damn girl! Now this is what I want to talk about. Okay, let’s start with the pre-IG era in my life. I had huge expectations about the people I was planning to follow, the stuffs I planned on talking about, how my attitude should be, the content I’d be posting, yadda yadda yadda. (yeah it’s a new phrase I picked up on recently, so you’re gonna see more of these in the coming writings). I had a feeling of colossal FOMO that I was missing out on all the fun people have on this platform. Coming to the IG era of my life, I finally have an account now. And now what? I don’t even wanna follow people on it. I don’t want to have a social life. Yes, I did reconnect with some of my old friends, but that’s just small talk, something that I’m not a huge fan of. But then I realized, people do not spend much time here as I thought they would. I assumed they post and dm all day. But boy, was I wrong? The truth is I wasn’t missing out on anything. It’s a plain life here. Not a soul spends his entire time on this app. And that’s the truth. And all this while, I had FOMO over nothing. Like wtf? I mean I am grateful that I was finally able to start one, but the FOMO? I had gone through that over nothing. Ngl, that did make a bit relieved. I thought I was missing out on a huge chunk of fun. What was wrong with me? Anyway, lesson learned. Not to give a damn about my mind and its irrational thoughts. So, two good things that are worth mentioning happened this week. The debate and IG. I always planned but hesitated on starting up with an account. But Your divine timing…I have no words. You just made me get what I wanted. Also, it’s a full moon tonight. Yay!”

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