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Journal-40 Out of the depressive hole

Date: 27.09.2021

Day: Monday

“Okaaay, y’all! :)) yupp, that’s right. I don’t think I’ve ever started using a smiley. Well, this is exactly how I feel right now. I mean for a couple of days, since Saturday I guess. So yeah, I’m sure you guys are in the loop about my mental situation of past weeks. How my mental health was just sliding down the graph each day. So this week, I made up my mind that I will not entertain anyone’s texts cause I am fucking gonna prioritize my mental health. This Saturday Mr. AJ or should I say “Mr. Ghoster” FINALLY texted me back, and guess what… I still haven’t responded to it. Now, the tables have turned and I’m gonna put him on read for a change. I feel rejuvenated and stress-free. Cause now I don’t have to check my phone every nick of a second to look for his messages. Gosh, trust me when I say that my whole depression was literally alleviated by this simple act. I’ve been through a lot in the past two weeks. Like literally a lot. I honestly can’t put into words the depressive episodes I’ve been through. Well, I’m so grateful for being done with that. I am in a blissful state now, I feel blessed. I am able to focus on my studies now. Also, a small tip from me to me… when taking a break from studies, instead of going on my phone to check for messages, watch TV. Maybe some Taylor Swift songs, Emma Chamberlain vlogs or maybe even Netflix. Whatever it is, it doesn’t matter as long as I don’t check my phone. Phone literally drains out your peace of mind. And you can take this piece of advice with a grain of salt…or not.

Ooh another great thing that happened today. It was kinda unexpected tbh. So yeah, tonight around 7pm my parents left for their friend’s. Well, as you may guessed, I was elated at my alone time. And yeah, that’s not even the best part. It was around 9pm now, and they still haven’t come back. So for the first time in my life, I heated up some leftovers from the fridge and I served myself, with Taylor Swift songs in the background. I was living my life!!! I love, absolutely love being a self-supporting bitch! It felt so great to be independent and to get your shit done on your own. I know, it’s no biggie to heat food for oneself. But trust me, living with my parents has made me dependent on them even for the simplest of the acts.

Anyway, I’m so beyond elated and grateful for this present life of mine. I really didn’t think I’d get out of that dark pitfall. But nope, the Universe has my back, and here I am.”

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